Crypto Crook’s Wallet Meets DOJ’s Hammer
In the grand tradition of humanity’s most creative financial schemes, a young man named Evan Tangeman has proven that laundering cryptocurrency is just a fancy way of saying “let’s rob people and buy things we don’t deserve.” The U.S. Department of Justice, ever the dramatic stagehand, has handed him 70 months in a cage, where he’ll have ample time to ponder the existential crisis of realizing he’s not as rich as he thought.