🤑 El Salvador’s Bitcoin Shenanigans: IMF Footnote Spills the Beans! 🕵️‍♂️

by

Ah, the grand farce of finance! The IMF, in its infinite wisdom, hath finally deigned to address the curious case of El Salvador’s Bitcoin hoarding. Lo and behold, the government, in a move as subtle as a clown at a funeral, hath been shuffling its Bitcoin stash from one pocket to another, all while proclaiming, “Behold, we buy more!” 🌪️💰

El Salvador’s Bitcoin Ballet: A Comedy of Consolidation 🎭

In the latest tome of bureaucratic drivel—a report on El Salvador’s compliance with the IMF’s $1.4 billion credit facility—the mystery of their Bitcoin accumulation hath been unraveled. Alas, it was not a tale of bold purchases, but a mere game of musical wallets! 🎶📲

The report, with a wink and a nudge, reveals that the Chivo Wallet’s liquidity policies have been more trouble than a goose in a china shop. Yet, the government, with a straight face, hath declared no new Bitcoin purchases for quite some time. 🦢🛒

In a footnote—that tiny scribble at the bottom of the page, where truths are often hidden—the IMF doth proclaim:

“Increases in bitcoin holdings in the Strategic Bitcoin Reserve Fund reflect the consolidation of bitcoin across various government-owned wallets.”

Ah, the first official word from the IMF, clarifying that what the government called “purchases” were but a magician’s trick, moving coins from one hat to another! 🎩🪄

This revelation doth echo the musings of Forbes’ own Javier Bastardo, who, like a shrewd detective, suspected the government’s “purchases” were but a charade. Even Rodrigo Valdes, the IMF’s sage of the Western Hemisphere, confirmed the country’s adherence to the deal’s terms in March. Yet, the National Bitcoin Office persisteth in its ambiguous tales, recently claiming to have “bought” more Bitcoin. Oh, the theatrics! 🎭🤥

And what of President Nayib Bukele? In March, he declared with the fervor of a tragedian, “No, it’s not stopping. If it didn’t stop when the world ostracized us and most ‘bitcoiners’ abandoned us, it won’t stop now, and it won’t stop in the future.” 🗣️✋ Alas, the IMF’s footnote doth cast a shadow on his grand pronouncements.

Read More

2025-07-19 06:57