So, Senator Cynthia Lummis wakes up at some ungodly hour in Europe on Nov. 5 and tweets-because that’s how serious legislation happens these days-about a Strategic Bitcoin Reserve. According to her, it’s “the only solution to offset our national debt.” Yeah, because when I think of national debt, I think, “Hey, let’s throw some Bitcoin at it and hope for the best!” 🤦♂️ She also gives a polite slow clap to @POTUS and his crew for not running screaming from the idea.
Where Does The Strategic Bitcoin Reserve Stand?
On Bloomberg Crypto (because where else?), Lummis addressed the burning question: are we selling our gold for Bitcoin? Her answer: nope, not yet, but hey, we’re looking at “other ideas.” Other ideas like… maybe magic? Or selling lemonade at the Senate steps? Who knows. Secretary Scott Bessent is apparently also “looking at those matters,” which is a fancy way of saying, “We’re thinking about it… sometimes.” 😬
Lummis frames Bitcoin as a long-term asset, which is cute. She says it’ll grow and help with national debt. Sure, why not? While we’re at it, maybe we should invest in Beanie Babies and Pokémon cards too. 📈
Then there’s the crypto market-structure bill. Apparently, there’s “tremendous progress” happening in staff-level discussions. Bipartisan! Daily! Everyone is super polite and totally on the same page… at least until someone actually votes. Lummis assures us that both parties are fully aware of what they’re signing, which is either comforting or terrifying. 😅
Regarding Senate Democrats, Lummis says they’ve been working since July (so like, 4 months ago?!) and things are “slower than we hoped.” Big shocker there. The goal: no surprise renegotiations later. Translation: someone will inevitably be mad anyway. 🙃
About Trump’s pardon of the Binance CEO? Lummis is like, “Not relevant, folks. Eyes on the prize-market structure!” Yeah, because nothing says stability like separating chaos from chaos. 🫣
Her legislative plan remains: stablecoins first, market structure second, Bitcoin Reserve last. Classic “we know what we’re doing” move. Meanwhile, Bitcoin is chilling at $102,080-because apparently, that’s normal. 💰
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2025-11-05 17:24