CoinDesk Indices
In a stunning twist of events that would make a quantum physicist faint and a parrot chuckle, CoinDesk Indices has delivered its daily market update-a masterclass in financial theatrics where 18 out of 20 assets decided to pretend they’re part of a stock market dance-off.
The CoinDesk 20 has decided to grace us with its presence at 2944.32, having risen 1.5% since 4 p.m. ET on Thursday. Because apparently, the universe needed more numbers and less existential dread.
Eighteen of the 20 assets have opted to rise, as if orchestrated by an overenthusiastic intern with a caffeine addiction. The other two? Still napping. Or brooding. Your guess is as good as theirs.
Leaders: SUI (+5.2%) and AAVE (+4.5%)-celestial overachievers who’ve probably already forgotten how to be humble. Laggards: APT (-0.9%) and HBAR (-0.1%)-the universe’s idea of a slacker duo. 🐢
The CoinDesk 20 is a broad-based index traded on multiple platforms globally. Because nothing says “global” like pretending to care about every continent except Antarctica. 🌍
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2025-12-12 17:47