Ethereum: Billionaires Are Losing Their Minds (But Buying Like It’s Black Friday) 🤯💸

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Ladies and gentlemen, grab your wallets and your coffee, because the Ethereum circus is in full swing! 🎪☕

Who needs a functioning brain when you can just throw millions at crypto and call it “strategic”? 😂 The price is down 3% this week alone, but that’s just a 24-hour sale to the big boys. Institutional investors? They’re still here, grinning like Cheshire cats. 🐱

Price Weakness Fails to Deter Major Buyers (Spoiler: They’re Just Shopping)

ETH is currently trading at $2,929.23, which is basically “on clearance” if you ask me. 🛍️ But hey, who cares when BitMine Immersion Technologies just dropped $201 million on 67,886 ETH? That’s like buying a yacht… but with crypto and no water. 🚢

And don’t even get me started on their previous day’s haul: $88.1 million from BitGo and Kraken. If this were Amazon, they’d call it “Prime Day.” 🛒

Big Money Moving Into ETH 👀

Tom Lee has already bought ~$953M worth of $ETH this month. That’s like buying a house… but for cryptocurrency. 🏠➡️💰

Meanwhile, Trend Research is here to play “bottom fisher.” Jack Yi’s firm just added 46,379 ETH, bringing their total to 580,000 ETH. Let’s just pretend that $1.72 billion is a “small investment” and their $141 million loss is a “tiny hiccup.” 😅

“They started bottom-fishing ETH in early November at around $3,400.” Translation: “We’re rich, and we’re bad at math.” 🧮

Jack Yi also announced they’re prepping another $1 billion for ETH. Because why not? Shorting ETH? Please. That’s for people who still believe in gravity. 🌪️

The “66k ETH Borrow” whale isn’t slacking either. They added 40,975 ETH ($121 million) to their collection. Since Nov 4, they’ve spent $1.69 billion. That’s like buying a new Tesla every hour. 🚘

“$881.5 million of the funds used to buy ETH were borrowed from Aave.” So, it’s not a mortgage. It’s a “crypto loan.” 🏦

Fasanara Capital? They’re just here to play leverage games. They bought $19.72 million in ETH, then borrowed $13 million to buy more. If this were a movie, they’d be the villain with a PhD in chaos. 🎩

Ethereum Whales Split as Buying and Selling Intensify (It’s Like a Reality Show)

But wait! Not everyone’s swimming in ETH. Arthur Hayes sent 682 ETH ($2 million) to Binance. That’s just his warm-up act-he sold $5.53 million in ETH last week while buying ENA, PENDLE, and ETHFI. “Rotating out of ETH” he says. Sounds like a fancy way of saying “panic.” 😬

“We’re rotating out of ETH and into high-quality DeFi names.” Translation: “I have no idea what I’m doing.” 🤷

And the Bitcoin OG whale deposited $292 million in ETH into Binance. Is this a sell signal? Probably. But maybe they’re just storing it for a rainy day. Or a sunny day. Who knows? ☔☀️

ETHZilla also sold $74.5 million in ETH to pay off debt. Meanwhile, selling activity among long-term holders has collapsed by 95%. Maybe they’re all busy pretending to be smart on Twitter. 🐦

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2025-12-24 16:32