Oh good, the crypto apocalypse is technically over! According to Dave the Wave, Bitcoin’s “buy zone” is now open, which is code for “hold my beer and watch this chart.”
To his 158,000 X followers, he’s basically saying BTC is now bouncing in a “buy zone” like a trampoline for investors. Because nothing says “trust me” like a logarithmic growth curve and a Fibonacci retracement. Classic combo, right?
Let’s be real: The LGC model is just a fancy way of saying “here’s a line on a chart that might predict the future if you squint.” But hey, it’s worked since 2018! That’s like saying your horoscope from 2018 predicted your 2025 breakup. Coincidence? Probably.
“As we can see by the chart, there is good reason to think the worst of the correction is behind us. That said, this does not mean to say there it will not be lengthier, or that prices will not go lower.” Translation: “It’s probably still going to tank, but let’s call it ‘volatility’ and sell you a course on how to ‘navigate it.’”
Per Dave’s chart, $50,000 is BTC’s new “floor.” Which is either a floor or a cliff-depends on how you’re feeling that day. And if it dips further? There’s a “support” level at $56,500. Because nothing says “support” like Fibonacci numbers and hope.
Bitcoin’s currently trading at $67,242. That’s a 0.15% gain today. A miracle, really, considering the market’s been acting like a toddler on a sugar rush. But don’t worry-Dave’s got a model. Probably.
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2026-03-09 10:23