💰 Ethereum Gobbles $2.12B Like a Starving Coyote! 🚀📈

by

The dust was thick and the air heavy when Ethereum dragged in $2.12 billion last week, panting like a farmhand after harvest, doubling its own sorry record without so much as a whisper of complaint.

The whole digital carnival spun wilder, pulling in $4.39 billion—more than those giddy days after the 2024 election when folks thought the world might right itself. It didn’t. But here we are.

Altcoins Hitch Their Wagons

CoinShares, those ledger-loving scribes, scribbled down that Ethereum’s been workin’ harder than a one-legged man at a kicking contest. Thirteen weeks of green, 23% of its pile under management. This year alone, it’s hauled in $6.2 billion—enough to make a banker blush or faint—whichever comes first.

The whole bloated beast of crypto management swelled to $220 billion, while ETPs traded a cool $39.2 billion. Not that anybody counted. Twice.

Bitcoin, old and sagging like a barn door, managed $2.2 billion—down from last week’s $2.7 billion. Shoulda seen the look on its face. Solana strutted in with $39 million, XRP waddled behind at $36 million, and little Sui scraped together $9.3 million like a kid collecting soda bottles for nickels. Chainlink and Cardano? Pocket lint—$0.9 million and $0.3 million, respectively. Bless their hearts.

The only losers? Multi-asset products, bleeding $16.4 million. Probably invested in turnips. Or politics.

QCP Capital, those fortune-tellers with calculators, muttered that Bitcoin’s dominance slipped from 64% to 60%, while Ethereum’s chunk grew from 9.7% to 11.6%. “Altcoin season’s comin’,” they whispered, like gamblers eyeing a rigged roulette wheel.

Money Flows Where It’s Tolerated

The U.S., that glutton, swallowed $4.37 billion. Switzerland nibbled $47.3 million, Australia and Hong Kong coughed up $17.3 million and $14.1 million—junk change under the couch cushions. Canada tossed in $3 million, which probably bought a hockey puck and half a donut.

Brazil and Sweden? They lost $28.1 million and $21 million, respectively. Germany shed $15.5 million—probably to pay for someone’s sensible shoes.

Read More

2025-07-22 03:03