qfx

The mastermind behind this digital con is an on-chain detective-kind of like Sherlock Holmes but with fewer pipe-smoking habits-going by ZachXBT. Apparently, the victim’s exchange and hardware wallet support lines were impersonated, which is practically the crypto equivalent of a con artist knocking on your door and claiming they’re from the “Pain Relief Department” of your bank.

Since July, when the U.S. government decided to give a proverbial thumbs-up with the GENIUS Act (because nothing says “trust” like a new law), Ethereum’s star has been rising faster than a helium balloon at a kid’s birthday party. Rumors of another high-profile crypto bill in September have pumped even more confidence into the market – and who doesn’t love a good legislative cheerleading squad?

Since March of the perplexing year 2024, BNB has been mostly lurking in the shadows-cuddling around, waiting for its moment. Yet last month, it decided to turn heads, soaring to a sparkling new peak of 810 dollars. While the universe’s vast chaos causes most assets to shiver in their digital boots, BNB held steadfast, reaching a resplendent 883.86 dollars. A salve for the crypto collective-bravo! 🥂

Now they’re lettin’ folks mess with this… Xapo Byzantine Bitcoin Credit Fund. Don’t ask me what ‘Byzantine’ means. Sounds complicated, and complicated usually means somebody’s getting a cut. It’s supposed to be a safe way – regulated, they call it – to make yer Bitcoin work for ya. Like puttin’ it under a mattress, only with more forms and a fella in a suit breathin’ down yer neck. Joey Garcia, a fella who runs things over there, says they’re tryin’ to mix the old ways of bankin’ with this new-fangled Bitcoin business. Says it’s just like savin’ dollars, only…digital. 🙄 Right.

Here’s the juicy scoop:

State Street, the granddaddy of finance (founded in 1792, no less!), is no slouch. With $4.7 trillion in assets under management and a whopping $46.6 trillion in custody and administration, they’re basically the Gandalf of the financial world-wise, powerful, and probably carrying a staff (or a ledger). 🧙‍♂️📜

CME Group disclosed a sharp uptick in XRP futures activity in a post on social media platform X on Aug. 21. The firm reported that open interest in XRP and micro XRP futures reached an all-time high with more than 6,000 contracts on Aug. 18, coinciding with the product’s anniversary. In its post, CME Group stated:

On their careers page, Visa is rolling out the red carpet-or is it a blockchain carpet?-for a data analyst to join their crypto product team in the sunny enclave of Foster City, California. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, will involve scratching your head over VisaNet and public blockchain data, as if you were trying to decode your cat’s meows. 🐱🔍 This isn’t just any data; it’s the kind that could make or break payment efficiency, as well as provide thrilling opportunities (don’t worry, no bungee jumping is involved). They say:

Brace yourself. The new mUSD stablecoin is designed to be as seamlessly integrated into the Metamask ecosystem as possible. Apparently, it’s going to be your go-to dollar-denominated asset for navigating decentralized applications and DeFi protocols. Initially, it’ll be launching on Ethereum and Linea (Consensys’s L2 network)-because, of course, what better way to get your feet wet than by dipping into two of the most beloved platforms in crypto?

This week feels like a poker game with all-in bets. The price hovers near $0.00001230, a number that’s more of a curse than a milestone. Will it break free, or will it crumble like a sandcastle at high tide? The question isn’t just about money-it’s about hope, sweat, and the cruel whims of the crypto gods.