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Now we’re stuck in this range-bound market with a slight bearish tilt. Support levels are being tested more than your patience during a long family dinner. If we’re lucky, we’ll see a higher-low scenario; if not, get ready for a plunge-it’s like waiting for the punchline of a bad joke that never comes.

Axie Infinity’s [AXS] recent sprint, a desperate attempt to outrun September’s ghosts, had many a holder clutching their wallets with the urgency of a man about to propose. Yet, the momentum, that fickle lover, now hinted at exhaustion, its breath hot on the neck of the bulls. One might say it was a dance of two steps forward and one step into a ditch.

The sell-off, once a timid whisper of post-holiday caution, now roared like a Cossack horde. Investors, with the grace of a drunkard fleeing a wedding, abandoned ship. The crypto ETFs, poor darlings, were left gasping in the wake of this financial tempest.

Lo, the whale (0x2d0…9f7bB), a specter of unbridled greed, first spewed 210.365 billion SHIB tokens, a sum worth $1.63 million, into the maw of Robinhood. These tokens, a staggering 97% of his hoard, now lie scattered like ashes in the wind. And yet, he did not cease. Further, he sent 1.52 billion to Robinhood and 7 billion to B2C2 Group, a cryptic OTC dance that bodes ill for the coin’s soul. The Shiba Inu, once a beacon of mirth, now weeps with a 7% decline, its tears spilling over the edge of yesterday’s abyss.

The four-hour MA 50, that fickle sentinel, has now slunk beneath the MA 200, a harbinger of doom, its descent a ballet of despair choreographed by the market’s capricious whims.

Across the daily chart, the mood has shifted from exuberance to caution. Bitcoin rallied impressively to $97,939 before faceplanting into a red candle meltdown that dragged it down to sub-$88,000 territory. That pullback occurred with heavy volume, signaling panic-or possibly capitulation-from leveraged hands. (It’s like a reality TV show where everyone’s crying, but no one’s winning.)

So here we have it, folks. The Netherlands is ready to hit the reset button on tax reform, aiming squarely at unrealized capital gains starting on the first day of 2028. Yes, you heard that right! Investors will be required to cough up annual taxes on assets ranging from Bitcoin (BTC) to stocks-even if they haven’t sold a single coin yet! Welcome to the Box 3 Actual Return Tax Law, where nothing is sacred.

In the shadow of crumbling tenements, where the air reeks of desperation and the streets hum with the whispers of the downtrodden, a new specter has emerged. Binance Wallet, that bastion of modern salvation, now offers three AI-driven marvels to guide the lost souls of the crypto realm. “Social Hype,” a digital oracle, scours the social media wastelands to crown the next big thing-though one wonders if it’s merely a puppet master pulling strings for the wealthy. “Topic Rush,” a relentless beast, tracks capital like a vulture, classifying narratives into stages of hope, despair, or delirium. And the “AI Assistant,” that paragon of efficiency, distills token data into a single, digestible lie. In this brave new world, where even the algorithms are more compassionate than the men who built them, the only true currency is the illusion of control.

According to Cryptoquant, the new whales-the ones who probably watched a TikTok about “HODL” before throwing their cash at BTC-now control more of Bitcoin’s realized cap than the OGs who’ve been here since the days of dial-up mining. This isn’t just a shift; it’s a full-blown coup. The market’s no longer dictated by the OGs’ “diamond hands” (a term that now feels tragically ironic), but by the jittery, “should I sell now?” vibes of the new guard.

BlackRock, ever the alchemist, has transmuted Bitcoin into a form palatable for the risk-averse. With a flourish, they’ve partnered with Delaware Life, embedding BTC into fixed index annuities-a realm where volatility is a four-letter word. Their index, a marriage of S&P 500 and Bitcoin’s chaos, now dances to the tune of 12% volatility, a dance so carefully choreographed it would make a tightrope walker weep with envy.