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The new law, they say, takes a great leap towards stopping stablecoin issuers from paying interest to holders. But here’s the kicker: it completely misses the point, ignoring other players like exchanges, brokers, or dealers. These crafty fellows can still offer similar incentives, which, in the bankers’ highly knowledgeable opinion, could lure deposits from the good old, reliable, traditional banking system into the wild, unregulated world of stablecoins. And that, my dear friends, could shrink the pool of capital they use to grant loans. A real nightmare! 📉💸

Alas, XRP sought to ascend beyond the $3.30 threshold, yet like Icarus, it faltered at $3.35, its wings scorched by the sun of resistance. A high was forged at $3.35, and the price, in its folly, embarked on a downward spiral, a tragic dance of correction.

On a day most ordinary, Bessent declared to the world via Fox Business that the Treasury, in its wisdom, would refrain from acquiring Bitcoin for the reserve. Little did he suspect this utterance would draw the ire of enthusiasts and cynics alike, who, like Tartuffe at the altar, demanded a contradiction.

Once upon a time, Bitcoin soared near $124,000 before the bears did the boogie-now it wobbles below $122,000. They dipped below $121,200 and that 100-hourly chart lover trend line, down to a testing round at the $117,250 zone. Are you shocked? I thought not…

Apparently, these guys need to “evaluate” the Bitwise and 21Shares Core Solana ETFs. You think evaluating involves, like, staring intently at a blockchain? Maybe consulting a magic eight ball? The Cboe BZX Exchange is involved, which sounds suspiciously like a sneeze.

This peculiar crossover, highlighted by the deft analyst James Van Straten in a tweeteth as engaging as a sonnet, demonstrates how the Bitcoin Realized Price-a magical financial divining rod that keeps curious tabs on the cost basis of the average Bitcoinian abode-has soared aloft like a proud sparrow.

Saylor, not known for modesty or hanging around between gigabytes, claims Bitcoin has historically handed out annualized returns of over 50%. That’s more than your garden-variety stocks and definitely more than your grandma’s savings account-which, frankly, might be as useful as a chocolate teapot. He insists that Bitcoin’s a ‘long-term asset,’ like a fine cheese, but one that actually gains value over time, instead of just smelling funny after a while.

It seems the market has caught a nasty case of the jitters, reacting to the latest U.S. inflation data as if it were a cat confronted with a cucumber. With Bitcoin previously frolicking above key resistance levels, this sell-off serves as a stark reminder that the market is as sensitive as a debutante at her first ball. 💃

But wait-what’s this? The price, that mischievous scamp, drops 9.61% down to a measly $0.94. A sudden tumble, like a clumsy bear tripping over his own paws! It flirted flirtatiously at $1.10, then took a nosedive. Resistance here? Of course-at $1.10, the stubborn bastard! Meanwhile, traders clutch their mugs, wondering if this is a dip or the beginning of the end. ☕🐻