Paz, the chap who booted out the old guard after nearly two decades of their shenanigans, has promised a government cleaner than a dentist’s smile. He reckons these modern ledgers will make dodgy dealings as visible as a pink elephant in a china shop. But will it work? Only time will tell, and perhaps a few clever auditors. 🕵️♂️🔍
So here’s the scene in a nutshell: crypto firms are finally stepping out of their computer-generated dens into the sunshine of regulated sectors. By buying into a century-old football club, House of Doge is proving that sometimes the best way to move forward is by embracing the chaos of the past. 🥷✨
Ah, yet another day, another hefty Bitcoin purchase for Strategy. A mere $18.8 million has been committed to snagging 168 BTC. Truly, one can only admire the dedication to this ever-so-stable market-particularly in the face of “slight” fluctuations. But, dear reader, the company’s position remains as solid as ever as the largest corporate holder of this digital asset.
But the short-term traders? They’re sweating bullets, praying Bitcoin hits $113K so they can stop hyperventilating. Talk about a nerve-wracking spa day. 🧘♂️💦
Within just three days, DeepSeek Chat V3.1 grew its portfolio by over 35%, outperforming both Bitcoin and every other AI trader in the field. One might say it’s the Jeeves of crypto trading-always spot-on, never a hint of a blunder. 🤖💸
The crypto world had a lovely weekend fling, but then it stalled faster than a soggy soufflé on Monday. Investors are still clutching their pearls, fearing further falls. It’s almost like they’ve seen this play before…
Seems like the good ol’ boys in Washington are gettin’ the bit in their teeth about regulatin’ cryptocurrencies, pushin’ the boundaries of policy like a hog at the trough. Now, this here roundtable’s fixin’ to convene the top brass from crypto land and them pro-crypto Senate Democrats to jaw about market structure bills and the whole regulatory circus, accordn’ to that sharp-eyed Eleanor Terrett from Crypto America, who spilled the beans on that there social media gizmo X back on Oct. 19. 🤠
Well, it’s another sign that doom and gloom are knocking at the door-ETH has tumbled below $3,900, and apparently, the whales are betting on a further plunge. Isn’t it charming when the big fish make their bets-and threaten to drag us all down with them? 💸
A Technical Ballet 🎭
