Cryptonews

Enter Chris Harvey, that sage of securities, who in a CNBC tête-à-tête channels the spirit of a Turgenev protagonist, gazing skeptically at the stock market’s frenzied rebound from April’s depths. “A lot of people are hunting for a pullback,” he quips, painting a circus of overextension, Fed uncertainties, and earnings woes—lions, tigers, and bears, oh the drama! 😂 Yet, instead of doom, he foresees a mere consolidation, a pause in the dance, as the Federal Reserve sharpens its dovish scissors for rate cuts ahead.

Picture this: BlackRock, the behemoth that turned Bitcoin and Ethereum ETFs into cash cows, now eyeing XRP like a cat spotting a laser pointer. After raking in over $86 billion for its Bitcoin Trust and $10.6 billion for Ethereum, you’d think they’d be content, but no—greed or genius, take your pick. Analysts are whispering that XRP is the obvious next conquest, especially with Teucrium and ProShares’ ETFs already hoovering up nearly $470 million in mere months. JPMorgan’s crystal ball even predicts $8 billion flooding in if XRP gets the ETF green light. Because nothing says ‘sensible investment’ like betting on crypto rumors, right? 😂💰

🚨 🚨 🚨 16,812,891 #XRP (53,416,371 USD) transferred from unknown wallet to #Coinbase

Divine, the self-proclaimed Robin Hood of the crypto world, offers loans under $1,000 in USDC, primarily to folks who’ve been ghosted by traditional finance. “We’re loaning to average Joes and Janes—high-school teachers, fruit vendors, and anyone who’s ever Googled ‘how to make money while napping,’” said Diego Estevez, Divine’s founder, in a chat with the Financial Times. “This is microfinance on steroids, but without the awkward drug test.” 💊

Ah, Ethereum Name Service [ENS], the star of our little financial theater, has decided to put on yet another show. In the past 24 hours, it rallied over 10%, climbing from a mid-July low of $18 to nearly $30. Bravo, ENS! 👏 This surge coincided with a sharp drop in Exchange Reserves and a spike in Outflows—apparently, everyone wanted their tokens off exchanges faster than you can say “blockchain.” But here’s the million-dollar question (or should I say $45?): Can this momentum last, or will profit-taking pressures crash the party? 🎉📉

And just when you thought it couldn’t get any wackier, a big-shot market expert has decided to rain on our Bitcoin parade with a forecast that’s gloomier than a double feature of horror movies. Yep, you guessed it! They’re predicting a plunge that could leave us holding onto our wallets for dear life, potentially dropping to the dreaded $109,000 zone. Buckle up, it’s about to get bumpy! 🎢

On a delightful July 25, the ever-so-sophisticated Chief Investment Officer of Bitwise, Matt Hougan, took to the eternal stage of social media platform X, sporting a most enigmatic flair. He boldly popped the question: “Why is the four-year cycle dead?” Well, Matt, perhaps it didn’t pay its taxes? 🕵️‍♂️

With funds fresh from the crypto ethers, they are embarking on a noble quest: to craft blockchain treasury systems that would make even the most cautious accountant swoon. Imagine, if you will, a magical toolbox that permits companies to oversee stablecoins and yield like seasoned financial magicians — all without the boring grind of traditional banks. Truly, the financial revolution has arrived, goggles and lab coats optional. 🧙‍♂️🔮

According to The Kobeissi Letter (yes, even newsletters have dramatic names now), spot Ether ETFs raked in a staggering $533.9 million on Tuesday alone—the largest single-day inflow these funds have ever seen. One imagines Bitcoin sitting in a corner, nursing a glass of lukewarm sherry while Ethereum dances the tango with newfound admirers. Analysts and investors alike are now whispering sweet nothings about Ethereum potentially surpassing Bitcoin in performance for the remainder of 2025. Mike Novogratz, CEO of Galaxy Digital, recently graced CNBC with his presence, declaring Ether a “highly compelling asset.” Compelling indeed—like watching a particularly riveting episode of *Downton Abbey*, but with fewer tea parties and more blockchain.

For years, holding Bitcoin [BTC] meant just that—holding it. 🤷‍♂️