In a tweet, which is trendy, Ray laid out the usual cyclical dance of currencies, which, if you’re a gambler or just a glutton for punishment, you’ll find remarkably repetitive. It’s sort of like groundhog day, but with more inflation and fewer cute rodents.
More than 150,000 crypto lovers (and probably their mothers) slapped down pre-orders for a phone that, if it had any more features, would fetch your slippers. This thing isn’t just smart, it’s an honors student-crypto developers and degens alike are drooling. If bullish sentiment was a sport, Solana’s fans would be Olympic gold medalists by now.
The same SEC, the big boss with a gavel and a lot of paperwork, decided to toss a coin in the air and see what lands. Turns out, liquid staking isn’t automatically a noose around your crypto neck. No sir, it’s more like a courtesy nod. They issued a statement-probably a long, boring one-saying that whether or not it’s a security depends on the actual details, not just the shiny tokens. Who knew? Apparently, the SEC believes that staking your crypto and getting back a token isn’t always an act of selling a security-no matter what some folks feared. Think of it as a wink and a nod, depending on the “facts and circumstances,” which sounds like a legalese version of “it depends.” Because nothing says clarity like regulatory mumbo jumbo, right?
Solana-based memecoin platform Pump.fun is having a moment… but not the good kind. In July, it made a measly $24.96 million, which is about as exciting as finding out your ex blocked you on LinkedIn. That’s an 80% drop from its peak in January when it raked in over $130 million (DefiLlama knows what’s up). Looks like the memecoin party might be winding down faster than you can say “to the moon.” 🚀📉
Now, let’s break it down: SOL is currently strutting around at $164.2. And what’s this? A 24-hour volatility of 2.0%? That’s like a rollercoaster ride without the safety bar! 🎢 Hold on tight, folks! The market cap is a jaw-dropping $88.41 B, and the volume in the last 24 hours is a staggering $5.60 B. Talk about a party! 🎈
At the time of writing, BNB was changing hands at $760, with a 24-hour volume exceeding $1 billion. A slight dip in prices over the day and a 9% decrease over the past week seem almost insignificant when you consider the broader context. In the last 24 hours, BNB danced between $755 and $770, with a seven-day range of $735 to $833. Remarkably, the token is only 12% shy of its record high of $858 (according to CoinGecko data), set on the mystical date of July 28, 2025.
The coin jumped from $162 to hit $171 faster than you can say “whale money,” with the trading volume exploding 23.54%, hitting nearly $5 billion. Looks like the whales aren’t just blowing bubbles-they’re buying into the chaos.
Only last January, President Trump (gold lettering optional) pointed an accusatory orange finger at BofA, declaiming on high that:
Three very short, but eventful, months after waving a not-so-teary farewell to its beloved auto financing unit (who needs cars when you can chase their weight in digital gold?), Cango’s machinery is whirring day and night, producing more Bitcoin than an idle government printer churns out regulations. Word on the street (or at least from those clever Farside Investors folks) is that in July, Cango mined 650.5 Bitcoin. In case you’re not quick on your math-that’s 200.5 more digital nuggets than last month. Farside, in a dramatic display of tough love, bumped up Cango on its fancy miner dashboard and dropped Hut 8, presumably for failing to send postcards.
Where’s it all going? Straight to the rumor mill, that’s where. Everyone is now an on-chain sleuth or a panic-yield farmer in the comments: “They’re reshuffling custody!” “No, they’re cashing out-run!” Translation: nobody has a scooby, but the memes are on fire. Meanwhile, ETH slipped from $3,734 down to $3,570 faster than you can say, “Wait, is this another Tuesday?” Still only 1.81% though-market behaving like it skipped its morning espresso ☕️.
