Well, butter my biscuit and call me a hodler! Seems like the crypto crowd is finally wising up-or at least, their wallets are. With hackers running amok like a pack of digital bandits, investors are scrambling to stash their precious coins in hardware wallets faster than a cat on a hot tin roof. 🏃💨
- Investors are hoarding hardware wallets like they’re the last slice of pie at a family reunion, all thanks to crypto hacks hitting record highs in 2025. 🥧
- Ledger’s coffers are swelling like a frog in a rainstorm, raking in triple-digit millions as exchanges get picked cleaner than a bone in a dog’s mouth. 🐸💰
- Turns out, it’s not just digital thieves you gotta worry about-physical attacks and kidnappings are on the rise too. Guess crypto holders are the new bank vaults, minus the security guards. 🏦🤦♂️
According to the Financial Times (those fancy folks with their pink papers), Ledger-the folks peddling USB-style vaults for your digital gold-is having a year so good, they’re probably popping champagne corks with their hardware wallets. Revenues? Triple-digit millions in 2025. That’s more zeros than a mathematician’s dream! 🍾💸
Meanwhile, a cool $2.2 billion in crypto got swiped in the first half of this year. That’s more than the whole of 2024! Guess the bad guys are working overtime-or maybe they just got a raise. 🤡💼
All this thievery has folks flocking to cold storage like it’s the Ark before the flood. Companies like Ledger, Trezor, and Tangem are the new Noahs, offering a dry spot in this crypto deluge. 🌊🚪
Crypto Hacks: Now Starring You!
Chainalysis (the folks who crunch numbers while you lose sleep) says 23% of hacks in the first half of 2025 targeted individual wallets. That’s right, your grandma’s Bitcoin stash isn’t safe either. “Increasingly significant,” they call it. I call it a circus-and we’re all clowns. 🎪🤡
North Korean hackers (yes, those guys) pulled off the heist of the century, swiping $1.5 billion from Bybit in February. Ari Redbord from TRM Labs put it best: “Record-setting year in lawful crypto activity? Check. Record-setting year in unlawful crypto activity? Double check.” 🎖️⚖️
Ledger’s CEO Pascal Gauthier spilled the beans to the Financial Times: “We’re being hacked more and more every day. Your bank accounts, your crypto-it’s like a buffet for hackers, and they’re coming back for seconds.” Pass the antacid, Pascal. 💻🩸
Oh, and Ledger? Valued at $1.5 billion in 2023. Guess crime doesn’t pay-unless you’re selling the solution. 🏆💼
When Digital Theft Goes Analog
With crypto prices soaring higher than a kite in a hurricane, criminals are getting creative. Kidnappings? Check. Physical attacks? Double check. Seems like holding crypto is the new extreme sport-danger included. 🪁🏋️♂️
Even Ledger’s co-founder got kidnapped in France earlier this year. Chainalysis warns that rising prices mean more “opportunistic physical attacks.” So, if you’re a crypto whale, maybe invest in a bodyguard too. Or a moat. 🏰🛡️
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2025-11-09 19:03