Crypto Chaos: When Regulators Lose Their Texts and Sense 📱🔥

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In the grim corridors of power where laws twist like barbed wire, the battle between Coinbase and the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission churns on, a spectacle equal parts tragedy and farce. Into this theater strides Charles Hoskinson, founder of Cardano, brandishing his sarcasm like a sharpened blade-aimed squarely at the fallen SEC czar, Gary Gensler.

The digital grapevine, now known as X, buzzes with whispered scandals and open jabs.

Coinbase Sings the SEC’s Dirty Laundry

Paul Grewal, Coinbase’s Chief Legal Officer, steps forward with tales from the trenches. The SEC, under the watchful gaze of Gensler, has apparently obliterated internal texts from October 2022 through September 2023-documents not just mundane chatter, but evidence tied to the legal quagmire they find themselves engulfed in. One might say, “Thou shalt not preserve,” became their secret creed.

“The Gensler SEC destroyed documents they were required to preserve and produce. We now have proof from the SEC’s own Inspector General,” Grewal thundered on X.

This destruction, a monument to hypocrisy, threatens the already crumbling public trust. Coinbase demands swift justice: expedited discovery, sanctions, and the immediate unveiling of any surviving whispers.

It is delicious irony: the stern regulator who pounds millions in fines for sloppy record-keeping among crypto rebels now shamelessly erases its own footprints in the snow.

Hoskinson’s Sardonic Salvo

Ever ready with a wry twist, Hoskinson replies with the cold ease of a cat flicking a paw at a snarling dog: “I’m sure Gary can come in and register :)”

I’m sure Gary can come in and register

– Charles Hoskinson (@IOHK_Charles) September 12, 2025

The barb cuts deep into a favorite mantra of Gensler’s tenure-a call echoing endlessly like a broken record, urging crypto firms to “just come in and register.” The joke, of course, is that the door was an illusion, the path a mirage, leaving honest players stumbling in the fog.

Now Hoskinson returns the taunt with cruel precision, revealing the great joke of hypocrisy that lies beneath.

Coinbase’s Endless Legal Wars

The SEC does not merely point fingers; it accuses Coinbase of the heresy of trading unregistered securities as a broker, exchange, and clearinghouse-all in one dizzying amalgam. Worse still, the “staking-as-a-service” program, a verdant river of revenue, is now branded illicit.

Since 2019, Coinbase reportedly raked in billions, skirting registration as nimbly as a fox escaping hunters in the forest. The SEC’s lament: investors were denied the protections promised-disclosures, inspections, safeguards-all sacrificed on the altar of convenience.

But this tale extends beyond a single fight.

In July, the federal regulator even locked horns with the FDIC, accusing them of casting crypto firms from banking’s warm hearth. Meanwhile, in Oregon, a quiet war brews over who holds dominion-the state or the federal overlords. Coinbase stands firm, demanding a clear legal dawn for crypto’s chaotic frontier.

A New Morning, or Just a Different Shadow?

Under the watch of President Trump’s second act, a curious figure rises: Chairman Paul Atkins. With a nod to “Project Crypto,” the SEC seems to trade its whip for a drafting pen, scripting simpler, gentler rules-rules that might yet coax innovation from the wilderness.

Atkins publicly declares that most crypto assets do not wear the label “security” and promises that where they must, the law’s hand will not crush but cultivate. Industry leaders and the America First Policy Institute applaud this apparent thaw in the frosty Gensler era.

Could this signal America’s ascent as the crypto capital of the world? Or is it but a passing glow before another nightfalls? One can only watch and wait, perhaps with a wink and the roll of a weary eye. After all, in the empire of bureaucracy, the absurd is often the only certainty. 🤡

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2025-09-12 14:14