Brian Sewell, the “Bitcoin Baba Yaga” 🧙♂️💸, got 3 years for swindling $2.9M and running a crypto speakeasy. Now he’s paying restitution like it’s a subscription service.
Meet Brian Sewell: 54-year-old Washington County resident, part-time fraud artist, and full-time disappointment to his parole officer. His 7-year crypto Ponzi scheme collapsed faster than a soufflé in a hurricane 🌪️.
Federal prosecutors spilled the tea: this guy ran TWO illegal schemes! One was so shady, even Bernie Madoff would’ve said, “Nah, too risky.” Both got 36-month sentences. Talk about a two-for-one jail special! 🍱
The “Investment” Trap (Spoiler: No Returns)
Sewell built his empire on lies so thick, Pinocchio would’ve sued him 🧸. Promised returns so high, they’d make a Vegas bookie blush 🎰. Spoiler: 17 victims lost $2.9M between 2017 and 2024. His secret? Telling people he was “Harvard-educated” when he clearly Googled “how to scam people” at 3 AM. 🎓
Judge Allen hit him with $3.6M in restitution – the gift that keeps on giving (to the government)! Plus $217K to Homeland Security because why not? 🎁
You might also like: Why Bitcoin’s “Resistance” Is Artificial (and your ex’s reasons for ghosting you)
Rockwell Capital: The Dark Side of Money Laundering
When he wasn’t defrauding grandmas, Sewell ran Rockwell Capital Management – a “business” that laundered $5.4M for drug dealers and fraudsters. Because nothing says “legit” like exchanging cash for crypto in a back alley. 🚿
FBI Agent Bohls called him a “predator” who lied so much, his own shadow started fact-checking him. Meanwhile, U.S. Attorney Holyoak vowed to stop financial abuse “one crypto kingpin at a time.” 🚔
SEC already fined him $1.8M earlier this year. Guess he didn’t learn his lesson? 🙃
DOJ’s crypto crackdown: coming soon to a courtroom near you! 🎬
Read More
- GBP CHF PREDICTION
- ETH PREDICTION. ETH cryptocurrency
- SOL PREDICTION. SOL cryptocurrency
- BTC PREDICTION. BTC cryptocurrency
- CNY JPY PREDICTION
- EUR RUB PREDICTION
- USD VND PREDICTION
- XMR PREDICTION. XMR cryptocurrency
- ENA PREDICTION. ENA cryptocurrency
- EUR ARS PREDICTION
2026-01-16 16:37