Larry David Predicts Rate Cuts After Crappy Jobs Report 😂

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So, I was sitting there, minding my own business, when I hear these so-called “financial institutions” and “market analysts” are saying the Fed is gonna do what? Slash interest rates twice in 2025? Are they serious? 🤔

Turns out, it’s because of this pathetic August jobs report where they only managed to add 22,000 jobs. What a joke! They were expecting 75,000. What, did everyone decide to take a vacation? 🌞

Now, Bank of America, which has been holding out like it’s 1999, suddenly thinks there’ll be two 25 basis point cuts in September and December. Like, what changed, the weather? 🌦️

Goldman Sachs, the guys who always think they know better, are saying it’s gonna be three 25 BPS cuts starting in September. Because why not? More cuts, more fun, right? 🎉

Citigroup, not to be outdone, is calling for a total of 75 BPS cuts, spread out over September, October, and December. They must have a crystal ball or something. 🧙‍♂️

And get this, 88% of traders now expect a 25 BPS cut at the next FOMC meeting in September. The other 12% are hoping for a 50 BPS cut, because why go small? 🚀

Lower interest rates mean more money sloshing around, which is great for crypto. Higher rates, not so much. It’s like the Fed is playing a game of “let’s see how much we can mess with the market.” 🤷‍♂️

Traders Anticipate Rate Cuts Amid Massive Job Numbers Revisions

Fed Chair Jerome Powell hinted at a September rate cut during his speech at the Jackson Hole symposium. Like he had a choice, with the jobs market looking like a high school dropout. 📉

The Fed’s dual mandate of max employment and price stability? More like max confusion and price chaos. 🤯

The Kobeissi Letter pointed out that the June jobs report was revised downward by 160,000 jobs. So, the US actually lost 13,000 jobs in June. Wow, that’s a real confidence booster. 😬

They also mentioned that the BLS revised 2024 job numbers down by 818,000, and might do the same for 2025 by 950,000. Talk about a roller coaster ride. 🎢

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2025-09-06 01:37