NFTs? Oy, vey! 📉

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So, the NFT market…it barely moved. Barely! It went down a whopping 0.47% to $65.58 million. A national emergency, I tell you! Last week it was $67.76 million. Like trading a slightly dented schnitzel for a perfectly good one. It’s…it’s tragic! 🎭

  • NFT sales? Still there. $65.6M. Buyers and sellers went up 24%…probably just confused people.
  • DMarket, schmatter! They got first, because Bitcoin BRC-20 NFTs are suddenly…a thing? Up 300%! I need a minute.
  • Bitcoin NFT’s going up, Ethereum and Solana going down. It’s a regular seesaw of disappointments! 🎢

People are participating! Can you believe it? 292,030 buyers – probably all looking for a quick buck. And 205,205 sellers…desperate, desperate people. Transactions down a smidge, 0.95%, maybe because everyone’s rethinking their life choices. 🤔

DMarket is Suddenly King (Don’t Ask Me Why)

This DMarket place – on something called “Mythos”, oy! – it’s at $5.32 million. Up 72.49%?! What are they selling, magic beans?! 142,989 transactions, 10,681 buyers, 9,007 sellers. A whole lotta shmoozing going on…

Courtyard? On…Polygon? ($4.99 million, 66.58% up). Sounds like a garden party with cryptocurrency. 67,082 transactions, 10,039 buyers, 2,192 sellers. Only 2,192? Where is everyone?!

And now…wait for it…$?? BRC-20 NFTs on Bitcoin are HUGE! $3.45 million! Up 335.14%! It’s a miracle! A complete and utter miracle! (Or a bubble. Most likely a bubble. 🫧)

2,100 transactions, 822 buyers, 602 sellers. Bitcoin is having a moment. Don’t tell Ethereum…

CryptoPunks jumped up too! ($2.51 million, 68.62% up!). But they’re still CryptoPunks. It’s like polishing a turd, frankly. 30 transactions, 25 buyers, 19 sellers. A prestigious group of 19.

Milady Maker? Dropped! Plummeted! Down 42.01% to $2.26 million. They should have stuck to making miladies. 130 transactions, 2 buyers, 1 seller. ONE seller! Oy, the shame!

YES BOND – so optimistic of a name 🙄, on BNB, is hanging in there at $2.15 million. Up a teensy bit. Like, you wouldn’t even notice. 1,643 transactions. A whole lotta nothin’.

Bitcoin Bucks the Trend (Go Figure)

Ethereum? Down! Down 23.92% to $20.88 million. Wash trading? $3.55 million! Shady. Very shady. But, hey, 19,798 buyers, getting their fingers burned.

Bitcoin! Up! Up 70.52% to $12.12 million! They’re laughing all the way to the bank…or wherever you store Bitcoin. Wash trading: $45,552. Peanuts! 9,904 buyers. Good for them!

BNB Chain is down, down, down! ($7.77 million, down 18.84%). $20,584 in wash trading. Still shady, just in smaller amounts. 42,673 buyers. Bless their hearts. ❤️

Polygon, up! ($6.06 million, up 44.33%). More wash trading! $10.59 million! I’m starting to smell a rat. Those 56,606 buyers? They’re suckers!

Mythos Chain? Up, up, up! ($5.46 million, 72.71%). With 27,248 buyers. It must be the name. Mythos sounds impressive.

Immutable, don’t even ask, it’s just…there. ($3.20 million, barely moved). 5,079 buyers. A quiet bunch.

Solana? Down! Down 23.03% to $2.93 million. 34,242 buyers. They deserve a medal for trying. 🏅

The Most Expensive JPEGs (Apparently)

So, the fanciest digital doodads? Two things called $X@AI and $?? BRC-20 NFTs… Don’t even bother trying to understand it.

  • $X@AI BRC-20 NFTs: $1.92 million? Madness!
  • $?? BRC-20 NFTs: $1.79 million? Mayim Bialik would be proud!

And some BTC Domain #372a75d6671ec00a1337f33999fb75acf9, went for $362,729.32! For a domain?! I’m starting to feel ill. 🤢

CryptoPunks are still hanging around, selling for enough to buy a small island. #8408, $118,176.63. #8476, $110,904.23. It’s all very…exciting? (I’m lying.)

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2025-12-27 09:29