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According to the official press release, which was as detailed as a farmer’s almanac, the over-the-counter crypto platform planned to use the funds to grow and expand its team, much like a farmer might plant more seeds in anticipation of a bountiful harvest. The goal was to meet the rising demand from institutions that were looking for a safer way to trade, one that didn’t involve leaving their hard-earned crypto in the hands of exchanges that seemed as stable as a house of cards.

Currently pirouetting around the $2.85 mark, Sui has demonstrated a remarkable resilience, bouncing off its $2.29 support zone with the elegance of a prima ballerina 💃. This rebound has allowed the token to maintain a firm foothold above the critical moving averages, including the 5-period and 60-period MAs on the 4-hour chart 📊. According to the astute crypto analyst @the_wolf_mind, this price “coil” around $2.85 is often the precursor to a significant directional move, suggesting that Sui’s volatility may soon give way to a decisive trend 🔄.

What’s fueling this glorious circus? Well, a cocktail of amateur excitement, gleeful whales doing as whales do (probably with monocles), and each coin’s own attempt at ecosystem “growth.” Of course, all this opera plays out on a stage where most altcoins can barely muster an understudy. Honestly, it’s peer-reviewed theater at this point.

In an interview with the FT, Simon Gerovich, the CEO of Metaplanet, revealed the company’s plans to accumulate as much Bitcoin as possible, a strategy that can only be described as “buy, buy, buy, and then buy some more 🤯”. The goal, it seems, is to use this wealth to acquire “cash-generating businesses”, a phrase that sounds suspiciously like a euphemism for “printing money 💸”.

This surge shows Sei’s capacity to compete with prominent blockchain networks such as Ethereum and Solana while solidifying its standing in decentralized finance (DeFi).

In a recent tweet, Garlinghouse announced that he feels as honored as a knight being knighted by the king to speak directly to the lawmakers about why the U.S. needs proper rules for digital assets. He also took a moment to thank the noble senators Tim Scott, Cynthia Lummis, and Ruben Gallego for leading the charge and supporting crypto-friendly rules. 🛡️📜

How did they do it, you ask? Well, it’s all thanks to their 145% increase in operational hashrate, which jumped from 20.4 EH/s to 50 EH/s over the past year. CEO Zach Bradford credited the achievement to recent infrastructure expansions across four U.S. states and called it a “9.6% increase from the previous month.” Talk about a boss move! 😎

This delightful announcement follows the final completion of a capital increase, as part of the “ATM-type” capital increase program with TOBAM, which raised about €1 million and facilitated the acquisition of 11 BTC. One might say, it’s like finding a small fortune in the back of a sofa. Additionally, the company completed a convertible bond issuance through its Luxembourg subsidiary, raising €10 million to acquire 105 BTC. The Blockchain Group reported a year-to-date BTC Yield of approximately 1,348.8%, with a BTC Gain of about 539.5 BTC and a BTC € Gain of roughly €49.7 million. The average acquisition price for the total BTC holdings is approximately €90,332 per bitcoin. Quite the bargain, wouldn’t you say? 🤑

Let’s spill the fizzy stuff: Coinbase, that raucous crypto bazaar, has shimmied its way back up to $380, according to the data elves at TradingView. Picture this as Willy Wonka handing you back your golden ticket after Augustus sat on it. It’s a comeback story good enough for the BFG’s bedtime tales!

The Russian Ministry of Energy, Federal Tax Service (FTS), and Ministry of Digital Development have joined forces to create this register, because, as we all know, unity is strength 💪. Deputy Energy Minister Petr Konyushenko confirmed that this register has already been dispatched to regions experiencing heightened miner activity, because who needs secrecy, anyway? 🤫