EURJPY

Enter Anton Tkachev, Yaroslav Samylin, and Georgy Arapov, fashionably dubbed the “New People” party-think of them as the rebellious dandies of the Duma. They’ve penned a rather stern letter to the noble Elvira Nabiullina-no doubt clutching their pearls-urging her to create a licensing system for crypto exchanges, complete with standards that would make a Victorian audacity blush. Capital requirements and all-talk about putting on a bridle for the crypto stallions! 🐎

This measure aims to prevent public officials from profiting off of cryptocurrencies while in office – and it’s no joke. The bill comes with hefty penalties for any violations.

Ripple’s Brad Garlinghouse took to X on Aug. 22 to declare that the Wyoming Blockchain Symposium (a place where blockchain nerds and policymakers gather to sip kombucha and debate the future of money) felt “dramatically different” from last year. Like, shocker-of-the-century different. “The change,” he said, “was so palpable you could’ve bottled it and sold it on OpenSea.” 🖼️💸

At the ungodly hour of 21:08 UTC, the token scaled a new peak of $4,885 on Bitstamp, its ascent a veritable tempest of 15% in a single day. One might say it danced with the angels-or at least with the algorithmic demons of the market. 🌪️

Summary

During a rather riveting tête-à-tête with John Collison, the co-founder and president of the payments firm Stripe, Armstrong waxed lyrical about Bitcoin’s potential to reach this astronomical figure. One can only imagine the glint in his eye as he spoke of the rising demand for Bitcoin, which he claims could ignite an explosive rally. Perhaps he’s been sipping too much of that magical crypto Kool-Aid? 🍹

Now, the market data tells a tale of folks gettin’ cold feet. According to them fancy ledger-keepers at CoinGlass, ENA open interest done slid over 3% to $1.26 billion, while the derivatives volume took a nosedive of nearly 27% in a single day. It seems the traders are pullin’ back to the porch to whittle and spit until this here market decides which way the river’s gonna flow. Analysts, those modern-day soothsayers, say it’s a sign everybody’s waitin’ for a clearer trail. As if any trail in this crypto wilderness was ever clear! 🤔

Yet, the market’s breath has been held in suspense, as if waiting for a performance that never arrives. A cautious optimism, one might say, akin to expecting a miracle at a tea party. 🍵

They say its volatility-a paltry 38%!-now mirrors that of sundry coffee purveyors and eccentric automotive magnates. Is this the grand, world-shaking currency of the future, or is it merely a respectable, and thus dreadfully boring, piece of patrimony for one’s dullard uncle to bequeath?

But hold your horses, or should I say, your Ether! 🐎 Instead of splurging immediately, SharpLink insists this is a “reserve tool,” a little black dress for the market’s moody days. 🛍️ Co-CEO Joseph Chalom, ever the suave strategist, explains it’s all about “striking when opportunities arise.” 🦅 Oh, the drama! Reinforcing the ETH-per-share ratio while rewarding long-term investors? Bravo! Encore! 👏