One cannot overstate the charm of the cup-and-handle pattern-it’s the financial equivalent of Jeeves polishing Bertie’s cufflinks before the big date. Cardano sits delicately between $0.88 and $0.89, catching its breath after a spirited climb, like a chap about to sprint to the buffet table.
Hines, who joined Tether as an advisor in mid-August, now finds himself at the helm of the USAT project as CEO of Tether USAT, according to a Sept. 12 press release. He’s putting his spin on this thing by saying the coin’s purpose is to “create a U.S.-regulated dollar-backed stablecoin designed to strengthen America’s role in the global economy.” That’s right, folks, they’re doing this for the good ol’ USA. 🇺🇸
Our dear Pudgy Penguins [PENGU] has certainly kept us entertained with its market rhythm-always rallying up, only to be followed by sharp corrections that make everyone wonder if it’s all worth it. But of course, like clockwork, it recovers. How quaint!
With the token loitering near the psychological precipice of $0.0001-a number so minuscule it could hide behind a decimal point and never be found-our intrepid analysts predict a “sustained rally.” 🏇 Oh, the audacity of hope! As if the crypto gods would deign to grant such a favor without a twist of irony or a dash of chaos. 🌀
Bullish volume? Check. Record reserves? Double-check. The LINK reserves have ballooned past 280,000, which is basically the crypto equivalent of a standing ovation. 👏 If this doesn’t scream “we’re going places,” I don’t know what does. The only question now is: will it hit $29? Spoiler alert: probably. But hey, this is crypto-expect the unexpected, like a sudden dip because someone’s hamster unplugged the server. 🐹
In the hallowed halls of X (formerly Twitter, lest we forget), Bloomberg’s own Eric Balchunas proclaimed that the meme coin ETF era is upon us, as REX-Osprey’s Dogecoin ETF (DOJE) prepares to launch under the 40 Act. 🌭 “The first U.S. ETF to hold something with no utility on purpose,” he quipped, a statement as bold as it is bewildering. And lo, there are more of these filings under the 33 Act, awaiting the SEC’s divine approval. The circus is just getting started, folks! 🎪
MPU) executed its first purchase under their fancy new “DeFi Asset Treasury” plan. They picked up $3 million worth of ENA tokens, because, sure, that’s what you do when you’re trying to “reinforce” your position in the world of stablecoins and governance tokens. 🤔
Ethereum’s price bumped up by a whopping 1.3% in the last day. Yeah, 1.3%! That’s like a polite nod in the crypto world, not a party. 🥳
The first spark of optimism? A Dogecoin ETF launching in the U.S. on September 11, 2025. The trader calls it a “financial barn dance,” inviting traditional investors to waltz into the memecoin pasture. “Now it’s not just a joke in a chatroom,” they snort. “It’s a stock market staple. You can’t buy a cup of coffee without it.” The ETF, they argue, is the difference between a stray dog and a show dog-suddenly, Dogecoin’s got pedigree.
As September unfolds its drama, the question on everyone’s lips is whether this rally will keep its pep or start wobbling like a three-legged donkey at the races. 🏇💨