Ah, perpetual futures-the crypto world’s answer to “Why stop when you can keep losing money indefinitely?” Singapore Exchange, ever the gracious host, is now offering institutions the thrill of betting on Bitcoin and Ether with no expiration date. How modern. 🥂
But let’s toast to ETH, shall we? It’s outshining BTC like a sequined gown at a black-tie gala. Derivatives positioning? Healthy. Liquidity flows? Fabulously on point. While BTC is sobbing into its blockchain, ETH is sashaying through the chaos like, “I woke up like this.” 💃✨
As the recent days have worn on, one might liken Bitcoin’s trajectory to a tormented soul, sliding inexorably toward the mid-\$90,000 threshold, its once-vibrant hue dimming in the spotlights of both spot and derivatives markets. Investors, clutching their ledgers and hearts, seem convinced only of their own misfortunes.
But don’t worry, the analysts from the Kobeissi Letter (who definitely don’t panic-tweet from their bathtubs) believe this isn’t just another Tuesday in Cryptoland. Nope, they’re calling it a ‘structural’ bear market-which sounds fancy but really just means “everyone’s freaking out and selling.”
While they’re making token holders feel like millionaires (sort of), as of now, no one in the SEC has officially labeled token buybacks or burns. It’s like a game of regulatory hide-and-seek. 🕵️♂️
According to Mr. Szabo, Bitcoin isn’t quite the invincible, trustless superweapon we’ve been led to believe. In fact, it’s more like a mischievous kitten that can be distracted or even choked by a team of overzealous governments and giant corporations. Who knew? 😱
A somber technical analysis by CoinDesk’s resident Cassandra, Omkar Godbole-because someone has to deliver bad news. 😔
Ether traded below $3,100 on Sunday-what a surprise, right? It was just another day in the digital asset downturn. At 9:36 p.m. UTC, the token was lingering near $3,066, down 3.4% over the past 24 hours. At around 4 p.m. UTC, it even dipped below the $3,100 level on Bitstamp, marking its first fall below that threshold since Nov. 4. Yes, it’s official: the sky is falling!
If Dash breaks past $100, it’s off to the races-$176, here we come! The rich get richer, but hey, maybe the little guy can catch a crumb. 🍞
It’s been a rough stretch for bitcoin (BTC), as the digital asset has fallen more than 9% since Nov. 9, and during the past day it trimmed another 1.7% against the U.S. dollar. 🧠📉
