On November 11, Curve Finance unveiled its Q3 report-a document so thrilling, it could put a cat to sleep. Yet here we are: $7.3 million in three-month revenue, up from Q2’s $3.9 million. A 89.7% increase! One might call it “modest,” but let’s not spoil the party. 🎉
In a move that surprised no one who’s ever heard of either Coinbase or the word ‘cryptocurrency,’, the exchange has rolled out a regulated savings account in Britain. Yep, the same folks with Nasdaq’s logo now claim they’re dabbling in the traditional banking pond-because nothing screams ‘tech forward’ like a bank account with your favorite blockchain superheroes. Announced on Nov. 11, it’s a mash-up of good old FSCS protections and instant access-like the Bank of England but with a dash more pizzazz.
According to the latest tittle-tattle from the financial set, heavyweight institutions such as Rothschild Investment and PNC Financial Services have been caught with their hands in the Solana cookie jar. They’ve disclosed holdings in Solana-based ETFs, marking a nine-week spree of inflows that’s now tipped the scales at over $2.1 billion. Blimey, that’s enough to make even Aunt Agatha raise an eyebrow! 😲
While Bitcoin lags behind stocks and gold like a tired donkey in a horse race, it still dares to flirt with 20% below its “all-time high.” Yet here we are, staring at a chart that looks like a drunk giraffe trying to dance the Macarena. 🦒💃
FTX’s bankruptcy wasn’t just a minor hiccup – it was the atomic bomb that detonated the fragile ecosystem of crypto. And, oh boy, did it send regulators scrambling like rats in a sinking ship. The world was suddenly awake to the need for transparency. And why not? Who wouldn’t want to know exactly where their crypto was, especially when it wasn’t in their own pocket?
The Yanks, ever the jokers in the deck, dismissed these allegations with the subtlety of a sledgehammer, insisting the Bitcoin was lawfully pilfered in a separate fraud case. This farcical exchange has reignited global anxieties over digital asset sovereignty, as if borders still matter in the age of quantum cryptocurrency.
According to the ever-watchful folks over at TradingView, ZEC’s rocket ride started in early September, breezing past long-term resistance at the $400 mark. But, as is often the case with these things, the thrill has faded, and analysts are nervously eyeing the horizon for signs of a crash.
According to a Forbes report (because who doesn’t love a good money splash), Lighter’s valuation is up to $1.5 billion. Yes, billion. That’s enough zeros to make even the most stoic coder go ‘what am I even doing here?’ And it’s only been a couple of years since its grand debut in 2022.
Alongside a rather terrifying chart of the US national debt now exceeding $38 trillion (because who doesn’t love a bit of debt drama), Pumpius suggests that government stimulus, monetary easing, and corporate spending are about to unleash a flood of capital greater than the rush to buy toilet paper in 2020. Yes, that kind of momentous liquidity surge.
Despite this minor setback, the market’s fervor has surged, with spot trading volume swelling by 23%, as if the very air crackles with renewed hope. Analysts, those modern-day prophets, whisper that this surge signals a return of the speculative masses, their eyes fixed on Bitcoin’s fleeting ascent to $106,000. 🧠
