EURJPY

Meanwhile, the world’s financiers are entranced by shiny metals-gold surpassing $4,300 an ounce, silver nudging past $66-trading in whispers of trust as if it were a secret society. But Bitcoin, the digital dandy, wobbles at $87,000, swaying like a tipsy aristocrat, down 6.4% in a week. Schiff, ever the cautious critic, suggests that this spectacle of volatility isn’t the sign of a resilient currency but a warning: “Jumping from the frying pan into the fire,” he quips, as investors clutch their smartphones and wallets, uncertain whether they’re chasing digital dreams or losing more than they bargained for.

Investors are fleeing Pi Coin faster than a toddler at a family reunion. 🤢 The once-bright future now looks like a dimly lit alley with a “No Entry” sign. 🚧

Gilbertie shared that launching an XRP ETF felt like ‘finding the one pair of jeans that actually fit after trying on 50,’ because he’s been deep in the crypto weeds (literally, probably, if he’s into derivatives). Bitcoin? He’s followed that for years. XRP? That’s his jam, and he knew this ETF was a ‘no-brainer,’ even if most people still think it’s a fancy new energy drink.

At last check, the big BTC was trading at $87,300, down 0.5% in 24 hours. Minutes earlier, it was up 3%. Talk about a mood swing-this market’s got more drama than a soap opera. 🎢😂

Enter ChartNerd, the Sherlock Holmes of squiggly lines, who’s waving around a weekly chart like it’s the Rosetta Stone. XRP, they say, is clinging to the bottom of its trading range like a toddler on a playground ladder. There’s this fancy five-wave corrective structure-because nothing says “I’m serious” like a fifth wave hitting support. 🌊 Apparently, this means the downward spiral might finally be tuckering itself out. Or, you know, it’s just taking a nap before another tantrum. 🤷‍♂️

It is here that our brave protagonist, SOL, currently valued at an astonishing $128.0, steps forth into the fray. With trepidation yet unwavering resolve, it announces:

Market sentiment? Worse than a Monday morning. The crypto fear and greed index has plummeted to 11, its lowest in a month, firmly stuck in the “fear zone.” Because who doesn’t love a good existential crisis? 😱 Major coins are clinging to technical support levels like it’s the last slice of pizza at a party. 🍕

The SEC dropped generic listing standards in October, which means no more 19(b) approvals for crypto ETPs. Imagine if getting a permit to open a hot dog stand took 240 days. Now it’s more like… “Here, have a bun and a wiener, enjoy!” 🌭 Thanks, SEC! Now everyone can launch an ETP while you’re still deciding if you want to buy it.

Bitcoin has churned between $86,000 and $88,000 over the past 24 hours, with Tuesday’s U.S. jobs data failing to inject meaningful volatility. The price sits near a major technical level which, if broken, could bring more pain. 😬

On December 16th, on-chain data revealed a $140 million transfer as BlackRock deposited 47,463 ETH into Coinbase Prime, a move that screams “chaos!” or “opportunity!” depending on your caffeine intake.