Solana Boss Yakovenko Uncorked a Boozy New DEX? Percolator Perils! 😏☕

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Oh, darling, just when I thought crypto founders were all sitting around twiddling their thumbs, Solana’s Anatoly Yakovenko pops up like a bad blind date – announcing another decentralized exchange (DEX), hot on the heels of those show-offs Hyperliquid and Astar. 😒💰

Monday morning, Yak’s scribbling plans for this sharded perpetual exchange thingy on Solana, calling it “Percolator.” Because nothing says “I’m a genius” like naming your tech after a coffee maker, right? ☕🚀

Right, so a perpetual exchange is basically crypto’s way of letting traders gamble on prices forever without that pesky expiration – like an eternal game of high-stakes bingo. Exciting? Terrifying? You decide. 😏

This Percolator beast has two main bits: the Router whirring away at collateral and margins (boring accountant stuff), and the Slab – some perpetuals engine run by liquidity dudes, with “fully self-contained” matching and settlement. Sounds classy, from Yak’s GitHub love letter. 📈

We pinged the Solana Foundation for a giggle, but crickets by press time – typical for these ethereal squads. 🦗

This drama unfolds just a week after Hyperliquid blasted off third parties to launch their own perpetual swaps, thanks to that HIP-3 upgrade. Now anyone staking half a million HYPE tokens (that’s $18.2 million, folks – buy me a coffee?) can play god. Money talks, or stalks. 😜

Hyperliquid stealing Solana’s thunder, even VanEck’s smirking 😏

Yak’s brewing this right as VanEck’s snooty report says Hyperliquid’s pinching users from Solana (and everyone else). In July, Hyperliquid snagged 35% of all blockchain loot, growing fatter while Solana withers – like me post-holiday. 🍩

“Hyperliquid poached high-value users from Solana,” bleat VanEck’s analysts, crediting their “simple, highly functional product.” Ouch, Yak – that’s gotta sting like a bad Tinder swipe. 💔

Hyperliquid’s volume hit $319 billion in July – more traders ditching CEXes for these wild DEX rides. It blew up in April with spot trading and that “hey, we’re nice” vibe. Meanwhile, Aster on BNB Chain zips past Hyperliquid, clocking $14.5 billion daily (triple Hyper’s in 24 hours – feeling salty, boys?). 🌊🚀

But Hyperliquid’s 30-day haul is $309 billion – double Aster’s $145 billion, per DefiLlama. Aster snuck back on the list today, after being booted for fuzzy data. Sketchy! 🔍

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2025-10-20 18:50