Scaramucci: Crypto Bear Market? It’s Just a Hibernate-y Nap!

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Well, slap my wallet and call me bearish! SkyBridge Capital’s own Anthony “The Mooch” Scaramucci has finally admitted what we’ve all been giggling about – crypto is in a bear market. Roaar! (That’s a bear sound, by the way, not my impression of a dying server.)

But fear not, fellow HODLers! While prices are doing the limbo (how low can they go?), Scaramucci, the Bitcoin bard, is urging us to look beyond the charts and into the crystal ball of demographics. Apparently, the real action is in the shifting sands of global capital, not the rollercoaster ride of your portfolio.

In a recent tweet (or should I say, a digital prophecy?), The Mooch proclaimed, “The question isn’t if the bear market will end, it’s how long it’ll take for these furballs to wake up and smell the blockchain!”

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Remember when Bitcoin was supposed to be the superhero fighting fiat currency debasement? Well, it seems our caped crusader is taking a nap while the villains run amok. “If this were a real currency crisis,” Scaramucci quipped, “Bitcoin would be soaring higher than a rocket fueled by FOMO.”

The problem, according to The Mooch, is those pesky 60-year-old institutional investors. They’re still clinging to their gold and silver like grandpas to their lawn chairs. “Crypto is young money,” he explained, “Old money moves slower than a tortoise on a Sunday stroll.”

Bear Market Blues? More Like a Crypto Siesta

Having survived more bear markets than most of us have had hot dinners, Scaramucci isn’t sweating the doom and gloom. He dismisses the “permanent naysayers” as “a chorus of crickets chirping ‘it’s over.'” Classic Scaramucci – always ready with a witty retort!

He reminds us that bear markets, like bad reality TV shows, eventually run out of steam. The key, he says, is to stay “solvent, unlevered, and psychologically intact” – basically, don’t panic sell and don’t forget to laugh at the memes.

$150,000? That’s Still a Bullish Bargain!

Remember when Scaramucci predicted Bitcoin hitting $170,000 by 2025? Well, he’s revised that target to a still-optimistic $150,000 by 2026. “We got a little too excited about the end of crypto winter,” he admitted, “but Washington’s legislative gridlock is thicker than a blockchain transaction fee.”

So, there you have it, folks. The Mooch says crypto’s just taking a nap, and when it wakes up, it’s going to be hungry for gains. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to stock up on digital tin foil hats and HODL memes.

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2026-02-22 13:04